As another academic year draws to a close, a seasoned educator is making a public appeal to parents, asking them to reconsider a common but burdensome end-of-year tradition. In a letter to the popular advice column Dear Abby, a teacher from New York unloaded a frustration felt by many in her profession.
The Unseen Burden of a "Cute Idea"
The teacher, who signed her letter "Already Overwhelmed in New York," is nearing the end of her 26th year in the classroom. She expresses deep love for her job and her students but highlights a specific practice that adds significant stress during an already chaotic time. She explains that many parents ask her—and all their children's teachers—to write a personal note as an inscription in a popular children's book. The parents then gift the inscribed book as a graduation memento.
While acknowledging the sentiment behind the gesture, the teacher clarifies the reality: it creates a "large stack of paperwork" when educators are swamped with final grades, reports, and administrative duties. She emphasizes that each individual request, when multiplied by a typical class size of 25 or more, becomes a major time commitment.
A Teacher's Defense: "I Have Already Given Your Kids My All"
In her letter, published on December 7, 2025, the educator makes a poignant case. She lists the ways she has supported her students over the year: instilling a passion for learning, fostering a love of reading, and helping them navigate complex social situations. She states she is not seeking praise but wants parents to understand the totality of her effort.
"I have ALREADY given your kids my all," she writes. Her direct request to parents is simple: "If you appreciate what I did for your child, please show your appreciation by NOT laying extra work on me at the end of the school year."
Abby's Practical Advice for Educators
Abby, the advice columnist penned by Jeanne Phillips, agreed to print the teacher's message. Recognizing that not all parents would see the column, Abby offered a proactive solution. She suggested that the teacher, and others in her position, could send a message in advance to well-meaning parents.
This pre-emptive communication would politely remind families that the final weeks are exceptionally stressful and to please refrain from making the book inscription request. This strategy aims to manage expectations before the last-minute rush begins.
The column also featured a second letter from a woman trapped in a 25-year relationship with a drug-addicted partner who refuses to leave her home. Abby's response was unequivocal: schedule an appointment with an attorney, stop financially enabling him, and consider filing a police report or seeking a restraining order if she feels endangered. Abby provided the contact information for the National Domestic Violence Hotline.
The teacher's plea sheds light on the often-overlooked administrative and emotional burdens educators carry, especially as the school year concludes. It serves as a reminder that the simplest gestures of appreciation for teachers might sometimes be less work, not more.