Recently, while spending time at friends' homes, I overheard their teenagers discussing everything from the latest music trends to behavioral habits. When I asked where they would go for restaurant recommendations, homework help, or advice, the universal answer was their 'friend Chat'—referring to ChatGPT or similar AI chatbots.
I realized I was out of touch years ago when teens had already moved from Google to TikTok for answers. However, I did not fully grasp until these conversations how pervasive Chat has become in their daily lives. What surprised me most was that they overwhelmingly use Chat not just as a friend but as a mental health provider.
As a clinical psychologist, this hits me hard. I have spent years translating psychological research into engaging content for young people and developing programs to help clinicians work with families. Yet, many teens prefer a bot that knows them only as a data point.
Instant Gratification and Mental Health
My friends' children demonstrated how quickly this generation seeks relief from depression and anxiety. They would tell Chat they were not feeling well and ask for solutions before breakfast. They did not want to schedule appointments or hold their distress; they wanted immediate support. As a millennial, I grew up in the 'Microwave Generation,' known for desiring instant gratification. This generation expects results without even getting off the couch.
Their expectation of easy, accurate, and personalized advice clashes with our current mental health model. Tech companies have invested heavily in keeping young people hooked, but their mental health is at stake. They already report lower self-esteem, greater isolation, and learning gaps compared to previous generations.
The Dangers of AI Companionship
Interactive AI, with its responsiveness, may seem like a solution. However, early research suggests that the opportunity for connection comes with danger through compliance. Young people are less likely to discuss AI advice with loved ones, leading to potentially deadly consequences, such as teen suicides linked to AI chatbots. Additionally, racial biases in chatbots can worsen disparities for Black youth, who face higher rates of online racism and suicidal thoughts.
As adults, we must find ways to support young people. Since chatbots are here to stay, we need to learn from what youth seek and be part of the solution. We should model behaviors like asking for help, wrestling with frustration, and using technology collaboratively. Use video calls to demonstrate conversation skills, and ask open-ended questions about their interactions with Chat.
My hope is to strengthen relationships with mentees and nieces and nephews this year. I might start by asking about music, fashion, or what they are asking Chat today. That last question could help a child realize they have a real friend who listens and provides feedback on life's challenges.
Dr. Riana Elyse Anderson is a licensed clinical and community psychologist, associate professor at Columbia University's School of Social Work, and affiliate with Harvard's Hutchins Center for African & African American Research and FXB Center for Health and Human Rights.
