For the masses of Canadians who have only recently started paying attention to international soccer, they may have noticed a peculiar quirk of the sport: matches can sometimes be decided by a penalty shootout. Five players on each team take a shot from the penalty spot, 12 yards in front of goal. Most goals wins, and they keep going until a decisive kick (or miss) is made.
The Harrowing Nature of Penalties
It is harrowing. It is the sporting equivalent of leaping from a plane having been told that there is an 80 per cent chance that your chute will open. And it will always leave one team in absolute nirvana, and the other crushed, heartbroken, utterly bereft. It is the worst.
And so, as the Canadian men's national team gets ready to play The Biggest Game in its History, for the fifth time running, on Saturday afternoon in Houston, we say this: Please, no penalties. Pray to your preferred deity (Lionel Messi?) that Canada will not have to go through the anguish of penalty kicks. Because as enjoyable as this World Cup ride has been, that's the kind of thing that can leave scars.
European Giants Fall
In this World Cup alone, Germany and the Netherlands, two European football giants, have exited the competition after the cruel twist of penalties. The Netherlands loss, which came this week against Morocco, was a perfect example of one of the weird realities of a penalty shootout: Despite the fact that players are aiming at a very large goal — 24 feet wide by eight feet high — from not far away, it often feels as though they are trying to squeeze a shot through the equivalent of a doggy door given the stakes and the tension.
The first Moroccan shooter hit the crossbar with his attempt. Then a Dutch player rattled one off the post. Then a second Dutchman, poor Quinten Timber, who looked terrified, pulled his shot so wide it might not have hit a 30-foot goal. Then another Moroccan hit the post. But, needing to score to keep the shootout going, Crysencio Summerville had his attempt blocked by goalkeeper Yassine Bounou (born in Montreal!), who somehow didn't leave his feet and still swatted the shot away.
Heartbreak in Minutes
The Dutch went from leading the shootout, to trailing it, to miraculously level again, to out of the tournament, all in the space of a few heart-in-mouth minutes. Gah. Please, no penalties. Germany's departure was no less cruel. They had largely controlled their game against Paraguay, but in the shootout missed two kicks and handed their opponents a huge advantage. Paraguay, with two chances to seal victory, missed both, giving the Germans an unexpected lifeline.
Jonathan Tah, a defender who had never taken a penalty kick before, promptly sailed his attempt over the crossbar and into about Row 25. Paraguay converted their sixth kick for the huge upset win. According to Scott Stinson, the sheer terror of a penalty shootout spares no one, and Canada should hope to avoid the same fate.
