A urinal is a beautiful thing, not only for its stately form, white brilliance, and soothing sounds, but also for its utility. So you can imagine my disappointment when I went to use the washroom at the newly renovated pavilion at Hawrelak Park. There is no men's or women's room, only a huge space with about 16 toilet stalls for users of both sexes. Not a urinal in sight.
I have been using men's rooms ever since I was a boy, and I have noticed a few things. First, only the occasional guy relieves himself in a stall. The vast majority of us opt for the elegant simplicity of the pissoir, where aiming is never a concern. Ah, yes, just let your mind wander. Whether your political orientation is right-of-centre or more left-leaning, everything drains where it should. The porcelain pissoir even catches the flung droplets from the pre-zip shake. Ingenious.
Of that tiny minority who choose to do their number one in a toilet, they do not seem to be very good aimers. And geez, if they would only lift the darn seat! All guys, on occasion, have to wipe away the previous jerk's residue before sitting down to unload. How bad could this problem get if not just a small few, but rather 100 per cent of guys, were made to urinate in a toilet stall?
We will soon find out in Hawrelak Park where all men and boys, good aimers and bad, toilet-seat lifters and non-lifters, will be splashing down into a non-gender-specific bowl. Males require a dry seat only for a number two, but for females, every visit involves a sit-down. Women and girls will simply have to get used to wiping away the previous bloke's amber effluent. Women have been cleaning up after men for centuries. With its new inclusive washroom, the City of Edmonton keeps that tradition alive.
The ladies' room occupies an iconic space in pop culture. A place just for women and girls, for a few minutes in a day. It is an inconvenient fact that some men sometimes leer. In a gender-inclusive washroom, will a teenage girl feel comfortable fixing herself in the mirror if she thinks that man over there is watching? Or a mother who needs to adjust her hijab on a windy day, but follows a cultural prohibition against strange men seeing her hair?
As I left the toilet stall and approached the handwashing area, my wife walked in, saw me, and said, “Oh, am I in the men's washroom?” I said, “No, this is the women's room. And the men's also.”
She said, “That doesn't make sense.” The lady washing her hands beside me shook her head, “She's right; it makes absolutely no sense.” The teenage girl beside her said, “It's so stupid.” The woman behind me was more pointed, “It's actually f--king ridiculous.” I had waded into a well of Edmontonian female discontent.
If it does not need fixing, do not break it. The old formula worked: a women's washroom, a men's with a few urinals, and a couple of separate stalls for anybody who wants to use them, which include a baby-changing station and a support bar for wheelchair users. Give people options, no restrictions, and the freedom to choose. Instead, this government eliminates choice, forces all males to urinate into a bowl, and relegates females to cleaning up after them. Amazing.
