A long-married woman has reached her breaking point with her husband's baseless accusations and isolating behaviour, seeking guidance from the iconic advice columnist, Dear Abby.
A Marriage Marred by Unfounded Accusations
In a letter published on January 2, 2026, a reader identifying as "Weary in Florida" outlines a distressing two-decade partnership. She and her husband, both in their 60s and in their second marriage, have been together for 23 years, married for nearly nine. The writer describes herself as socially active, making friends easily and participating in community work, especially after retiring and relocating for her husband's job.
Her husband's life stands in stark contrast. He has zero friends, adhering strictly to a routine of work and home. For years, he has accused his wife of desiring relationships with male friends within their social circle, even suggesting she should "go on and be happy with the other man." She insists neither she nor her friends have ever given him reason for this "pathological jealousy."
Professional Pride Blocks Path to Help
The situation has escalated with the woman's involvement on a nonprofit board, requiring frequent communication with the male president, who has become the latest target of her husband's suspicions. Seeking couples counselling appears impossible because, ironically, psychiatry is her husband's professional specialty. He reportedly believes he is always right and has never apologized in all their years together.
"I do not respond to his tirades because it's pointless, but I'm sick and tired of his behaviour and thought process," she writes. While she understands potential roots in his heritage and upbringing, she refuses to accept them as a carte blanche excuse.
Abby's Blunt Assessment and Advice
Abby, penned by Jeanne Phillips, offers a direct and sobering response. She characterizes the husband as a "bottomless vessel of insecurity" and doubts the wife can assuage it after so many failed years. She notes that many mental health professionals themselves seek therapy, but the critical barrier is the husband's unwillingness to admit he might be the problem.
"Frankly, I am surprised your marriage has lasted this long," Abby states. Her pivotal advice is a question meant to guide the reader forward: "Is this how you want to live the rest of your life? Answering that question is the way to move forward."
Secondary Concern: Youth Altercations on Private Property
The column also features a second letter from "Witness in Ohio," who works from home near a middle school. This reader is repeatedly breaking up fights among unfamiliar students in their yard, concerned about potential injury and liability. Unsure whether to ignore it, contact the school, or call police, they seek a measured solution.
Abby recommends a two-pronged approach: first, contact the school principal to report the ongoing issue. Second, file a report with the local police department so they are aware of the situation, which may prompt a quicker response if future incidents occur.
The Dear Abby column was founded by Pauline Phillips and is written by her daughter, Abigail Van Buren (Jeanne Phillips).
